by Maddie Nehlen

George RR Martin sits at home and laughs as Games of Thrones destroys lives. How is this dissimilar to the MTA?

Daenerys Targaryen – The L Train

“You would be not only respected and feared, you would be loved.”

Just like our friend the L train, Daenerys was born to rule. Most of us live and die by the fickle nature of the L, and thusly it is both loved and feared. Also like, that hair is straight out of Williamsburg.

Arya Stark – The 7 Train

Misunderstood, often masquerading as something it’s not, sometimes locked away in its little subway station until it’s freed by the MTA: the 7 train is the literal Arya Stark equivalent.

Sansa Stark – The 42nd Street Shuttle

Sansa has had a rough go of it. She’s very nice to look at, but she doesn’t have a whole lot of say in things. She and the 42nd Street Shuttle have a lot in common. They are both brimming with eagerness, and the potential to be tasked with more than they are given.

Tyrion Lannister – The G Train

What the G lacks in power, size, speed, and quality of service, it makes up for in charm. We’ve all heard stories of the once great G train and how it could take you anywhere you wanted to go…in Brooklyn. We anxiously await the day that Tyrion, and the G train rise to power again.

Jon Snow – The D Train

The bastard son of the B and the F train, Jon Snow…er I mean the D train is pretty underrated. Sure, it’s a blast to make fun of, and you could probably go the rest of your life without taking it. But let’s be honest, it’s probably gotten you out of some sticky situations, and you’d miss it if it were gone for good.

Cersei Lannister – LOL She’s Uber

Queen Cersei is the epitome of class and elegance, even in a time that had no running water. She wouldn’t be caught dead in a subway. She is the Uber Black Car, bow down to her.

Theon Greyjoy – The Q Train

Sure, you used to love the Q train when you first moved to Manhattan. “It’s so great! It’s express!” But of late, just like Theon, it has betrayed you time and time again, and you just can’t trust it anymore. Sadly now the Q is to you, what Ramsay Bolton is to poor old Theon Greyjoy. It reeks.

All images property of HBO and its affiliates.

Game of Trains - All Men Must Wait